Comfort a unmet need


Many moons ago , when Christmas trees where tall and our two daughters where small,

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Sufrani and Elsabe with me and my wife

we as family travelled a lot , and every time when we travelled through the country side and Sufrani and Elsabe noticed big animals with their ‘children’ They always said:

There is the mother ( s) and their children! For me it was very annoying , because It was a proof that I as father and fathers in general was absent fathers in their little minds.

Being with people living with dementia, for a great part of my life the last year or more ,corroborated their statement day by day!

Why? You maybe asked me:

Because in many different ways , we as care givers , very often hear our ‘dementia family’ speak about, or asked for, or cry for their mothers when they are in need for comfort, feels alone or are afraid, or any other unmet need their long term memory reminds them of their mothers, who might be the one who can help

They are calling out for their mothers, hallucinating about their mothers and even act like one another’s mother!

I like to share with you one of the most beautiful ‘mother child comforting’ acts that happened this week at our Dementia care home !

Look at the picture and try to celebrate the beauty of humanity with us, despite dementia! You can, if you do understand that this is a single bed and the ‘child’ in this case is Tannie Sophia who is blind but found her way at night to the bed of her ‘mother’ Tannie Joey!

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Joyi [left] and Sophia [ right]

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